“I hate Motun”. Those were the first words I had ever heard her say about me. I knew she didn’t like me but I didn’t expect her to hate me. Some would say it’s a woman thing but I doubt it. This isn’t a woman thing. I’m a woman and I don’t feel inferior or superior to other women even when they dress better, look better, wear makeup better, than I do. I just can’t fathom being in any other skin apart from mine.
Who on earth is this person I’m talking about? Yeah… Andrea is someone I’ve known since childhood. We grew up on the same street and went to the same schools. Ever since we were old enough to know right from wrong, Andrea always avoided me. I was the school nerd, she was the popular cheerleader type. But somehow I just rubbed off her the wrong way. I never had the opportunities Andrea had while growing up, I worked hard to get to where I am today. Still, she doesn’t like me.It’s not like I’m an attention-seeking person or something, but I’m never comfortable when I know someone is uncomfortable with me. I’m just not built that way.
Hearing Andrea say those words today gave me a thought-shift. And I realized that not everyone will like you, love you, or even be comfortable with you. It’s not because you’ve done something wrong but because they just can’t bear the sight of you. I have come to discover that why some people claim they hate you is because they envy you- they envy your looks, your style, your carriage, your poise, and simply everything tangible and intangible about you.
Others just don’t like you because they are incapable of liking anyone else that seems or behaves better than they do. They are incapable of feeling positive about the success and greatness of others. It’s not that they’re built that way, it’s just that the choices they have made that is so obvious.
And if you’re someone who doesn’t see the good in others; you relish their failures and pain- you feel they’ve gotten their just desserts, then it’s high time you make a change too. You can’t afford to be bitter or envious about what others have. You weren’t made or created to do so. You were born to create your own path in life and follow it.
Why then would you hate someone? Is it because of gender, looks, race, ability, sexuality? This shouldn’t be you whether you’re a man or woman.
Especially for women; we’re meant to help and build each other, not harbor malice or anger or hatred. You may not ‘love’ the person but you shouldn’t hate them either. The least you can do is to be neutral.
Today’s a new day to start afresh; a day to smile at Motun, Andrea, Grace, or Susan. Let your face carry a smile and let your thoughts be negativity- free.
I love you!